If your husband is talking to another woman, neither yell at your husband nor get furious at that woman, rather be diplomatic and tender in your dealings. Bring the facts to light and instead of listening to your heart listen to your mind.
As he is just talking to another woman, it does not mean, in your furiousness, you spoil the things to that level from where coming back becomes impossible. To be tactful would be the more reasonable choice if you want to have your husband again on track.
Here we have some do’s and don’ts to eliminate the issue.
Find out why and when it started.
In a long-run relationship, sometimes it happens that one starts to feel bored and dull. Routine life from year to year makes the spouses indifferent to each other.
As they find no novelty in their relationship, the emotional gap starts to develop. Remember, the preliminary point was a communication gap which has now developed into an emotional gap. It is the point from which many of the relationship issues are produced.
Wise are the ones who foresee this scenario and try to adorn their relationship with something new and pleasant. They always bring uniqueness to keep the shades of the relationship fresh.
Issues are not produced immediately. Especially in relationships, issues develop step by step. They look timid at their initial point, but we overlook them. After that, as days pass, they are developed in their vulnerable magnitude, and all that we get is pain.
The earlier an issue is recognized, the easier it is to deal with it. If we are late, it reaches its huge volume and becomes difficult to tackle. But still, it can be settled.
All problems have one good thing, and it is, they can be solved and settled. So be optimistic about your approach and stay sure that soon your husband will not talk to another woman.
From here, return to your earlier days and try to discover where and when it started. Since when has your husband lost his interest in you?
You can’t say that he has not lost his interest in you because it is the depletion of interest in your person that created the room for him to talk to another woman.
Try to recollect everything regarding your relationship with your husband for the previous six months.
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Being pensive, you would come to know lots of things. You would come to know about the drawbacks and the deficiencies of your relationship. And one more thing, but frankly, everyone feeds his own demon. Nobody is willing to acknowledge that he is wrong. If there are those who acknowledge it, they are few.
There is an issue between you people and one of you is responsible for it. Even both of you may have your share.
Now, rather than criticizing one another, it is beneficial to pursue the solution.
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Be liable to yourself.
His inclination toward another woman is motivated due to two motives. First, he has lost his emotional bond with you. Second, he is habitual or is having colored nature and can’t miss the beautiful faces.
If the problem is the first one, then you should be accountable to yourself. In case you have not given him enough time and comfort, then try to give both of these immediately because it would help you in grabbing his attention.
And having his attention, you can mold him further according to your concerns.
If he is having colored nature, then it would be better to make him understand that it hurts when he soothes his ears and eyes with other voices and faces. Tell him it pains you, though, to him; it is nothing as it is impossible to share one’s love.
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You can’t control your husband instantly. It will take time. What you can and should do is to control yourself. To get angry at undesirable things is not unnatural. Rather, it is considered healthy. But in case if it becomes uncontrollable, it will devastate physically and emotionally.
Anger is not the solution to problems. It has the potential to sour relations to the level, from where backtracking becomes impossible.
So, as you are running into a problem, you require to compete with the jam sensibly, as anger and sensibility are pools apart, so keep them away from each other.
Control yourself, relax and admit that you are in a fix of life and this riddle can only be solved by controlling yourself and taking sensible decisions.
Do not express anger.
The normal manner to respond to undesirable happenings is anger. As we respond to being angry, we certainly and unconsciously become aggressive and being aggressive; you can make the man destroyed but can’t win him back.
So keeping the anger behavior away from you would be better. Even if you are angry, don’t express it as he is already engaged to other women. Your anger will add trouble and you would lose him completely.
Examine the events and conditions.
Before concluding any result that he talks to other women, examines things.
✍Are you sure he is talking to another woman?
✍Are you confident that both of them have something like an affair?
✍Do you know that woman and her character?
✍Do you know your husband whether he has been a philanderer in his life or if he was always committed to you?
These are some questions for you to ask yourself. Answering these questions accurately would bring you the basic nature of the problem.
By his walks and talks and his behavior, you can just judge whether there is something serious, or he is just teasing you.
Become a submissive partner in your role.
You are so wise to realize that man can’t be defeated even if you destroy him, so it would be better to take him back with love and affection.
Nowadays, nobody prefers to be a classical submissive wife. But if you choose your role as a submissive wife, for a fortnight, half of your problem will be solved without doing anything further.
Your submission to your spouse is actually his submission to you.
Our suggestion to be the submissive wife can be undesirable to you, but as a matter of fact, it would prove your best tool to win your husband’s love back.
If you look at the things beneath the surface, you would come to know that by becoming submissive to your husband, you have made him your submissive. When being submissive, you will start treating him, he would be impressed and appealed by your dealings, and inwardly he would be ashamed of himself for having an affair with another woman.
Thus, your submission will render you the fruit of your life.
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Share your concerns with your husband.
After spending fourteen or fifteen days in submission, now it’s time to discuss your worries with your husband.
If you find him in a pleasant mood, ask him, I have something to say. If he agrees, then select a comfortable room. Give him a seat and sit beside him.
Begin in a low tone and in humble manners, “you are half of my whole.
Without you, my half is futile. My half in itself is nothing unless you make it whole. I want you never to separate your half from me. I can’t help living without you.”
As you say, don’t sit near him anymore. Stand up and go back to your work routine.
By your words, you have compelled him to be ashamed of his cheating. You did not go harsh at him, but you have done half of your job.
After 3 or 4 days, again ask him that you have something to share with him and again, in a lower tone and deep words, address him, “I know I am not perfect in my role. There are several issues. You can ask me and I would definitely overcome them. What I want from you is to give me dedication. I am all for you. I can’t help living without you.”
Say it and leave. Don’t stay to have his feedback. We send our message to him that he is doing something wrong, and we have conveyed it. Now he would be compelled by himself to settle the things.
Related: how to talk to your husband about problems without fighting
Don’t try to demonstrate that he is wrong.
Being proved by some other woman, even being married looks strange and feels undesirable, but as a matter of fact, sometimes it becomes natural.
In healthy relationships, usually, it doesn’t happen, but the question that you have submitted shows that you are feeling insecure. You have concerns about it.
In your concerns, when you try to alleviate them, don’t try to demonstrate to your husband that he is wrong. It will spoil things to a vulnerable level. Once, in the lives of both of you, he was overwhelmed by you. Was that a natural phenomenon?
Yes, that was.
Now, if he is talking to another woman, it is also a natural phenomenon to him, but it can’t be justified. If you try, “You, you and only you, “it will make him stubborn. Now at least he is in doubt whether you know about his affair or not.
Or even if you know, then how much?
If he thinks you are in doubt, let him be in doubt about it.
Don’t clarify things for him. He is wrong and he is doing it against the ethics, we know, but proving him wrong again and again will not get fruit.
In the previously mentioned point, we suggested you how to convey your message without any conflict. Just try that and keep calm.
Don’t try to change him forcefully.
You can’t lock his mind. Your husband is free in his thinking. We all are free in our thinking. You can’t change him forcefully. You can’t stuff his mind with your opinions and priorities.
If you say, ” You are no more affectionate towards me.” It would do nothing good. Instead, if you say, “I want more affection and care from you,” it will work.
So you can change him, but only by being tender, courteous, and soft. In communication, try to use positive connotations.
If you try to compel him to change his way, he would certainly not change.
Don’t approach that woman.
Usually, you would be advised to approach the woman who is talking to your husband, but we certainly don’t recommend so.
As your husband is already inclined toward that woman, and she would immediately tell your husband that you have approached her, in return your husband will only listen to that woman and she would find another soft corner and you would lose another point.
You don’t have any concern with that woman. What you want is from your husband and not from that woman.
So even if you get furious at her inwardly, stay cool as we have nothing to do with her. We have to bring our man back to the track.
In short, instead of being emotional or aggressive, you need to choose mind over the heart to restrain your husband from talking to another woman.
Considering the suggestions mentioned above, stay optimistic. We have a staunch hope you will soon win your husband back.
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